Life on Hold

I started listening to Loveline again a few months ago. That show was nightly listening for me throughout high school and into college, and it's interesting to hear so many years later that the show really hasn't changed so much and that kids are still facing the same problems.

One new part of the show is the "Open Forum," where listeners share their opinion on a nightly topic. The topic the other night was if you'd rather put love or your career on hold. The answers were pretty mixed, though most said they'd choose one or the other.

At this point, I wouldn't choose one over the other. I've spent my life thinking I have an infinity in front of me, that I had as much time as I needed to do what I wanted to, to try what I wanted to, to be who I wanted to. Having three grandparents in their 90s has definitely helped that feeling along, "I have 80, 70, 60 … years ahead of me. Why rush?"

If you put any part of your life on hold, you may not have enough time to go back and take it off hold. You may get so far behind, you can't catch up. Or, at least you'll feel like you can't.

Putting this project together has several goals for me, to remind me of the finite nature of our time in this world (though not of time itself, which is truly infinite) and to also encourage me to make the most of the time I do have. To do that, I know I can't put anything on hold.

I've gotten a few people working on the questionnaire I've created, and have started asking more people if they'd like to complete one. I hope to be posting them here shortly. The questionnaire I've created is below. Please get in touch if you'd like to contribute.

What year did you turn 35?
Where were you living then?
What were you doing then (working, going to school, raising kids, etc.)?
What big personal milestones happened when you were 35 (got married, bought a house, moved to a new city, started a new job, etc.)?
What major events happened in the world that year?
What are your favorite memories of being 35?
What did you like best about yourself at that age?
What did you like least about yourself at that age?
What were the biggest lessons you learned at that age?
What were the biggest misconceptions you had about being 35?
What was the most surprising thing about being 35?
If you could go back to that age knowing what you know now, what would you do differently?
What advice can you offer to other 35-year-old women?
Is there anything else you'd like to share about your experiences being 35?